aide: (大野 → Unimpressed)
Well, I'm surprised.  I thought I would have to fight a lot more with people to get all my shit reissued but it was quite easy to get everything done.  Work had no problem with me leaving early.  I got a little lecture from the lady at city hall for not updating my card when I updated my visa but otherwise it was painless.  I had to sign a statement about what happened to my card and that was it.  I paid for the certificate to show I was issued a card for the bank but they wouldn't take it.  I thought they would since they do when you open a fucking account but apparently not so I wasted 300 yen there.  They just printed me a new health insurance card on the spot and I also stopped in at my doctors and got a new card there too.  I'll just have to wait for my bank cards to come in the mail.  Knowing Japan, they will be delivered during the day when I'm not fucking here.  Nakamura sensei lent me 10,000 yen until I get my bank stuff sorted out so I can at least eat.  I'm really grateful. 

I'm going to have my last lesson with the 3rd years this week.  Nakamura-sensei said he wanted to do something "fun" with them.  If my quiz show wasn't fun, I don't know what else to do.  I think trivia is freaking sweet but it took me so long to think of questions and write them in a way they would understand.  Any suggestions?

No kitty corpse this morning and the cleaner came today so the guts or whatever outside my door is gone.  I'm going to get paranoid everytime I hear a cat now.  I wonder if there's some deformed one around the apartment.  

Sato Ryuta is the guest on Shukudai tonight.  That's worth staying up for. :)
aide: (Sorry. Emo time.)
So, people might be wondering about my date.  The first one was okay.  It was a bit stiff which is to be expected when meeting someone for the first time but honestly, it was pretty bland and boring.  And then I had to go meet him again yesterday because I got ahead of myself and invited him out with my friends after going to the museum.  The museum was great but I though it would take a lot longer.  We were done there by 2:30 and weren't meeting Ariel in Shibuya until 7:30.  So... we killed time wandering in Ueno and then Shibuya... and it was just awkward.  I was so bored.  I was mailing Ariel descretely with pained messages.  I felt really bad.  But in the end he saved me and said he wasn't feeling well from lunch and went home early.  I wasn't too bummed, since I am a pessimist and never expect meeting people online to work out.  It's never for me.  Not once. 

So Justin, Ariel and I got some dinner and were joined by Ben and Andrew and then we hit up karaoke.  I hadn't really thought about staying out but I usually do anyway.  We brought our costumes and dressed up in the karaoke room and snuck in our own booze and had a grand old time.  But I drank waaay too much and don't really remember leaving the karaoke place.  I remember getting on the train and waiting for it to move, staring at some girls book because I needed to focus on something because I had the spins.  And then I remember squating on the sidewalk outside Shinjuku station with water but not walking to the club because I was watching the pavement the whole time being lead by Ari.  We got to Ni-Chome and as soon as we got to Arty's I started crying and couldn't stop.  I basically sat in the stairwell crying for what must have been 30 minutes.  And then when I was feeling better, went inside to find the others, went to the bathroom with Ari who almost picked a fight with some bitchy queen who took my water away (because I bought it outside the club).  I don't even know what time it was but I lost people and then Andrew found me and then I sat in the corner and waited for him to find people so we could leave and but they took so long so I went outside to get fresh air... then they found me again and there was talk of curry but Ari and I wanted to go so we cabbed back to her place and crashed.

I woke up no-so-hungover in Ari's nice Roppongi apartment and arranged to meet Andrew in Shinjuku to pick up my phone (which he confiscated from me so I wouldn't do anything stupid last night... as if I could see letters straight in my condition) and when I got there found that my wallet was missing.  I lost my fucking wallet with all my ID, cards, money.  Everything.  I cried some more in the middle of Shinjuku station again with Andrew and Ben trying to call the karaoke place to see if they found it.  No luck.  So we asked the lady at the information booth about the number for taxi company's and apparently (luckily?) there is a central number for all the companies so we filed a report for my wallet with them in case they find it and then reported it missing to the koban.  And then Andrew treated me to lunch.

I've called both banks and gotten all my cards cancelled and new ones reissued.  I got my phone activated to call internationally which I should have done ages ago.  I'm just waiting for RBC to do some security check so that they can mail my cards to me here in Japan and call me back.  Tomorrow I have to go to city hall and get my gaikokujin torokusho reissued and see what I can do about my health insurance card.  I've lost all my membership cards and point cards too which is a fucking pain in the ass.  Mostly for my doctor and hairdresser.   The only point card worth getting back is my Bic one because I actually redeem those points on occasion.  I've got to find out how to contact ICBC and get my driver's license reissued.  It's going to expire next month anyway, but I'll need it to get it renewed when I go back, I think.

I don't remember crying so much in such a short period of time.  I feel a little bit ridiculous.  And kind of anxious.  I have about 1000 in change on me and that's it.  It's going to be a pretty sparse week until my new bank card comes in the mail.  There is a bright side to this, however: I did want to buy a new wallet and now I have to.
aide: (Sho sez: WTF.)
I went to bed at 11:30pm and as I expected I was still tossing by 12:30 but I didn't watch Shukudai becuase I know that makes me wired everytime.  I turned off the AC, I didn't need it but was awake again at 2... and then 3... and then 4... did I even fall asleep?  I don't know.  I could have taken the last of the melatonin I have but my body was tired, my eyes were staying closed and I don't think my brain was working too much but it must have been.  I don't feel terrible now but I suppose it'll take a while to hit me.  It always does.  Luckily there's no reason to stay up on Tuesdays so if I feel like crashing at 9, I will.  I guess I can feel proud that I didn't get up and go on the computer like I usually do when I can't sleep?  I tried, I really did!  It just wasn't happening.  There will be much coffee intake today.


Aug. 19th, 2008 06:18 pm
aide: (Default)
Ugh... I think I need to eat better.  I have noticed that my moods just nosedive.

Went to Akihabara with Jenna today... met up with Andrew for an hour before he went off to Avex.  I impulse shopped and bought a DS from Book Off for $120 but have no games for it.  I should tell mom to take a look at EB Games and see if they have anything used for a decent price and ask her to send it to me.  I should look at Ebay too.  I'll look at it as an investment.  I used my Arashi ticket refund to buy it so it's not like I am spending any more mony.  Or that's what I keep telling myself.  Anyone got any good RPG recommendations?

I have been itching to write something since Jenna arrived but haven't had the time to sit down without feeling rude for ignoring her.  I'm not in the mood to write angst... even though I am feeling pretty angsty myself.  I'll catch up with fandom and watch all these freaking Truth performances and stuff that I've downloaded and hopefully that will boost my mood.  I want to get this chapter done (I want to say it's halfway) before the end of the week.  I've got 2 weeks of vacation left but it feels so busy!

20th/27th - Keigo's lessons
23rd - Fireworks (This Heart's Rendition concert, which I won't be going to)
26th - Kashiwa City English Speech Contest
28th - Fireworks at Yuka's place in Shinagawa
29th - Yvonne's coming aka Slutty Times
30th - Hakone Onsen Trip/24Hr TV starts (which I'm probably going to miss the beginning D: ...I just hope I don't miss Jun's drama, which is on at 9pm)

Luckily I have the whole first week of September off as well, although I should drop in at school and see what's happening on Sports Day and what time I need to show up and what they'll have me doing.

Alexandre Despatie made it to the finals for 3m Springboard.  :D  It's on at 8:30pm Beijing time, 9:30pm Tokyo and Terauchi made it through for Japan they should be broadcasting it, hopefully live.  The semi's were live so I am hopeful. 

Technology is hating me.  Computer overheated yesterday, iPod is not playing songs properly today.  Maybe they aren't the right formats?  I don't think so because some of the songs from the same album/single play just fine.  It is extremely frustrating and I am trying not to chuck the damn thing out the window.
aide: (Default)

77-year-old man confesses to killing 4 members of family in Chiba


Four members of a family were found dead Tuesday morning at their home in Kashiwa, Chiba Prefecture, after police received a call from a 77-year-old man saying he killed all other members of his family. Those killed were identified as Tokiko Kiuchi, 75, her son Shigeru, 49, his wife Miyuki, 44, and their daughter Manami, 4. Police are questioning Kiuchi’s 77-year-old husband, who made the call.

All four were apparently beaten about the head, police said. The suspect was sent to hospital after being found unconscious near a telephone at the main building of their home in Kashiwa, about 30 kilometers northeast of Tokyo. Police said they have found a blood-tainted hammer in a kitchen. Kiuchi, Shigeru and Miyuki were found dead in the main house and the small daughter was on the second floor of an annex, police said. Shigeru, a teacher at a municipal junior high school in Kashiwa, was on a three-month sick leave that began in late May, according to the municipal board of education.

(Japan Today)

4 family members found dead in suspected murder-suicide bid

KASHIWA, Chiba -- Four family members were found dead in their home on Tuesday morning, in what police suspect to be an attempted murder-suicide by the head of the family.

Tokiko Kiuchi, 75, her 49-year-old son Shigeru and his 44-year-old wife Miyuki, and the couple's 4-year-old daughter Manami were found dead at their home in Kashiwa, police said.

Tokiko's 77-year-old husband, Yoshio Kiuchi, was found in a state of shock and was taken to hospital, police said. Investigators suspect that Yoshio Kiuchi tried to commit murder-suicide and will question him over the incident.

According to police, a man called police from Kiuchi's home at around 7:05 a.m. on Tuesday, saying, "I killed all the members of my family." Police rushed to the scene and found the four members of the family dead.

There were traces of the four victims having been hit by something like a blunt object on their heads and other parts of their bodies, police said.

Investigators retrieved a blood-stained hammer from the kitchen of the main house, and Yoshio Kiuchi was found collapsed nearby in blood-stained clothes, police said.

The bodies of Tokiko, Shigeru and Miyuki were found in the main house, while Manami was found collapsed in pajamas on the second floor of an annex.

The door of the main house was not locked, but there was no trace of someone having intruded into the house from outside, according to police.

(Mainichi Japan) June 24, 2008

The son was a teacher at Amanda's school.  I knew Japan was fucked up but I never thought it would hit so close to home.  I already feel disturbed when I read the news and 90% of the national headlines are about murders or suicides but now I am going to be wondering if I know someone who knows that person.  It's scary.
aide: (Guard dog Aiba)
I feel like I've been running on empty for four days.  I am tired.  That word doesn't convey any real meaning anymore; I've been complaining about being tired since I was about fifteen.  Haven't we all?

I didn't really get a chance to recoup after Nagoya.  Yesterday was dead with only two classes (2nd and 5th period) so that was mighty relaxing.  I got some tests to check so that kept me looking busy.  I browsed the big ALT book Yvonne gave me but that's about it.  Andrew's dinner was fun though not a surprise at all.  He knew there would be more than just the three of us but it was a bit of a surprise as to who was there, I suppose.  The love hotel mission was a giant failure so we went to sing an hour of karaoke instead.  Andrew, me, Ben and Takashi, Ben's man this week, went back to their place to crash.  Andrew and I watched an episode of Star Trek and tried not to hear the other two having sex.  I wonder if straight sex sounds that... wet. 

Got up around 930, out the door by 1030 and went to the IES office to get my paperwork for immigration.  They told me how to fill out the forms and set me up so that was good but it took fucking half an hour.  I hate going there because the boss is the slowest man on the planet and needs to explain everything despite it being written in plain English.  Whatever.  Managed to navigate through Tokyo to Tokyo Station and caught the Keiyo Liine to Chiba MInato and met Nikki who took me to the office and got my immigration paperwork done.  It wasn't busy but she grabbed me a number on her way to meet me so I didn't even have to wait that long. 

I grabbed a few new books at the bookstore at Hamamatsucho Station.  I got Jpod by Douglas Coupland (SO GOOD.  I'm 150 pages in already.) and A Short History of Nearly Everything by Bill Bryson.  I borrowed that off someone back in Vancouver but it sat on my shelf and I never got past the first chapter.  And then I read other stuff by him in my writing class and realized his awesomeness but still didn't get around to it.  So I bought it.  Those should keep me occupied for a week, while I put off reading Mishima again.  It's a bit of a shit show because I spend 3000 yen on 2 books and am done them in less than a week.  I really need to start going to Book Off and spending less on them if I'm going to read them that fast.

At a late lunch so I'm not hungry for dinner and besides, I have no food in my house.  I could make some miso soup but that's about it.  I want to read some of the fics that have been updated and watch Shukudai and watch Clerks and read Jpod and write (I have a good idea for something totally not related to The Epic even though I should start writing chapter 4).  But my brain is saying, "Sleeeeeeeeeeeep..............." even though it's 630. 

I'm teaching Grade 6 this Friday.  What the hell am I going to do?
aide: (Guard dog Aiba)
Things that have gone wrong today:
  • Schedule change, AGAIN.  Without prior warning - in fact after class had started and I made an ass of myself in front of class 2-1 because they couldn't understand me.  I didn't want to embarrass myself more by busting out my shitty Japanese (plus I'm not supposed to).  It turned out fine because I got 2 more frees out of the deal but still.  If you're so sick that you come late to work and then 5 minutes late to class, stay home.
  • I was excited for Kimchi Pork Don for lunch but it was a let down.  Not as kimchiy as I would have liked.  I actually wanted spicy food today.
  • Searched on Tsutaya's website for Clerks and found it!  Huzzah!  So I get there after work and ask for it but they don't have it so they search around on the internet but no luck.  And I couldn't tell if they didn't have it in any stores nearby or at all.  Either way, no Clerks.
    • BUT ON A HIGH NOTE, if this torrent works properly I'LL HAVE CLERKS IN 45 MINUTES.  (YES THIS NEEDS CAPS.)
  • Went to the 100 Yen Shop after tutoring to get a file for McJohnny's (yes I printed out 34 pages of JE fic porn glory on the company dime) but they had NO A4 size clear files.  What the fuck?  I thought about going to the one down the street but I was too lazy.  I'll go to the one next to school tomorrow, they usually have a decent selection and are stocked.
  • It's 7:55pm and I haven't even thought about cooking yet.  My sink is full of dishes from 2 days ago that I need to tackle before I can start to cook.  But I'm not even that hungry... but I have to cook or all the food I bought will go to waste before I get a chance to eat it.  And that sucks.  However, knowing me, once I start and smell the stewy goodness, it will make me hungry.
Upside?  I went shopping and bought 2 new t-shirts (black cuz Nikki still has mine plain black tshirt from like 4 months ago, and pink) and a new light hoodie/sweater.  My orientations hoodie is about ready to bite the dust.  I thought about getting one with short sleeves but that defeats the purpose of wearing a sweater, if you ask me.  3 items for 4000 yen.  Pretty good.  And I used my new Visa and it worked like a charm.  Now I pay that off ASAP and keep it at 0.  EMERGENCIES ONLY, HEATHER. 

I'm not sure what recombent means exactly, but I haven't used that mood yet.  The picture is pretty accurate, though.
aide: (Bitch slapped)
It's 8:13am.  Why is the name of all that is holy and good in this world am I awake?

Oh, that's right.  Because Shinya, who can't hold his alcohol to save his life and drinks so much that he becomes a pseudo-straight emotionally dependent child, crawled into MY bed at 6-goddamn-o'clock this morning and started snoring in my ear.  I pushed, I poked, I shook, I fucking yelled at him in my best stage whisper to roll over or SOMETHING to SHUT THE FUCK UP but to no avail.  I physically rotated this man myself and he didn't wake up.  Either he was still drunk as, or he sleeps like the dead.  If I did wake him up, I don't feel bad because it wasn't so pleasant having a cold body (I guess he didn't share so well with Benben) crawl into my warm coccoon and shock me awake. 

Wow, did that sound bitchy?

Maybe.  Just a little.

My well of writing-desire seems to have dried up.  Well, the desire is there, the motivation is not.  Despite all the wonderful comments, it doesn't bring me to write anything.  I want to write some of these prompts that I've had for weeks now, but nothing comes when I want to start.  Honooko posted a new chapter so I'm going to read that this morning and maybe it'll inspire me with something.  I'm going to work on a few more songs too until I'm tired and then take a nap.  It's a disgusting wet day so I can't do laundry even if I wanted to.  I could clean but I don't want to.  I really don't want to do anything.  I'll translate a bit, watch some of these shows that are queued up on my computer and sleep. 

That sounds like a great idea.

Less groggy/cranky update about the pimpin' karaoke bar we went to last night later. 


Apr. 18th, 2008 03:11 am
aide: (Bitch slapped)
It's 3:12am and I'm still awake.  Why? 

I was hungry so I ate and watched a MMA episode with Aiba and Jun, which I just finished porning (and fucking well, if I say so myself, no pun intended).  Anyone catching the irony here?  Jun's face is growing on me, but only on TV when it isn't caught at weird moments and he can smile naturally.

I poked over to Savage Love (my new/old obsession) and read the column, or letter in replacement of, that tells why he took a few weeks off.  His mother died.  I have a book of his columns and read what he had to write about her and she sounded like one hell of a lady.  I feel like crying because they seemed really close and had a great relationship.  And as fucked up as it sounds, I feel like I know Dan through reading the column and listening to his podcast.  And maybe it's because I haven't heard from mine in nearly 3 weeks.

Should bang off an email to mom tomorrow for no other reason than I haven't since March.

At a Loss

April 3, 2008

I thought I could bang out a column today—a regular column, a column about my readers' problems and their freaky fetishes and all those asshole politicians out there. You know, the usual.

The day my son was born, I managed to slip out of the maternity ward and write a column; I wrote one the day I was indicted by the state of Iowa for licking Gary Bauer's doorknobs. (I was actually indicted for voter fraud—on a trumped-up charge, your honor—but Bauer's knob needs all the attention it can get.) I've written columns on days that I was dumped and on the morning of 9/11. So I figured that I could bang out a column today.

I opened my laptop and started reading your letters. I love reading your letters—I do. But I couldn't get into it. I just don't have a column in me this week. I'm disappointed in myself. I write this column at Ann Landers's desk, for crying out loud, and the old lady banged out a heartbreaking, truncated column when her marriage collapsed. If Landers could bang one out under that kind of emotional strain, then I could damn well bang one out, too. Just do it, right? Just fucking do it. But I just fucking can't.

My mother died on Monday.

Perhaps a sex-advice column isn't an appropriate place to eulogize an articulate, elegant woman, a practicing Catholic named for the patron saint of hopeless causes and, perhaps consequently, a Cubs fan. I mean, really. Eulogizing my mother back here with the escort ads? So let's not think of this as a eulogy. Let's think of it as a thank-you note, the kind of nicety that my mother appreciated.

Forgive the cliché: My mom gave me so much. She gave me life, of course, and some other stuff besides: her sense of humor, her bionic bullshit detectors, her colossal sweet tooth. She also gave me—she gave all four of her children (Bill, Ed, Dan, Laura)—her unconditional love. Long after I came out, she told me she always suspected that I might be gay; I was the quiet one, the boy who liked Broadway musicals and baking cakes and shared her passion for Strauss waltzes. When I asked my parents to take me to the national tour of A Chorus Line for my 13th birthday, that should have settled the matter. Your third son? Total fag, lady. But my parents were Catholic and religious and it somehow still came as a shock when I told them. My mother came around fast and she came out swinging—rainbow stickers on her car, a PFLAG membership card in her wallet, and an ultimatum delivered to the whole family: Anyone who had a problem with me had a problem with her.

But the real reason I feel compelled to thank her in this space, back here with the escort ads, is because I wouldn't have this space if it weren't for her.

My mother, as my brother Bill likes to say, made friends like Rockefeller made money and George W. Bush makes mistakes—and she was that friend you confided in and went to for advice. I was a mama's boy—hello—and I spent a great deal of time in my mother's kitchen listening to her tell her friends exactly what they needed to do. Sometimes gently, sometimes brusquely, always with a dose of humor. My mom liked to say that her son got paid to do something that she did for free—and isn't that the way the world works? Women cook, men are chefs; women are housewives, men are butlers; she gave advice, I got paid to give advice. (And for a few years, she did too; my mother and I wrote a joint column for a couple of websites in the 1990s.)

So I want to thank my mom. I wouldn't be writing this column today if it weren't for her gifts and her ability to find the humor in even the most serious of subjects.

Even death, even her own.

After a long struggle, we had to go into my mother's hospital room and tell her that nothing more could be done. She didn't go into the hospital expecting to die and she was not ready to go. But she took the news with her characteristic grace. She said her farewells, asked us never to forget her (as if), and paused for a moment. Then Mom lifted an eyebrow, shrugged, and said...


My mother wasn't crude; I didn't get my foul mouth from her. She used profanity sparingly and then only in italics and quotation marks. When she said "shit" on her deathbed, we understood the joke. What she meant was this: "Now, the kind of person who casually uses profanity might be inclined to say 'shit' at a moment like this. But I'm not the kind of person who casually uses profanity—and certainly not at a moment like this. But if I were the kind of person who casually used profanity, 'shit' might be the word I would use right now. If I were that kind of person. Which I'm not."

Everyone gathered around her bed—my mother's husband (my son has two fathers and so do I), my sister, my aunt—knew what Mom wanted: She wanted us to laugh. This woman, so full of life, who wanted so badly to live, having just been told she would not, she was trying to lift our spirits. ("Shit," for the record, wasn't her last word. Those were just for the family.)

Anyway, my mom is dead, and I am not in the mood, as she used to say. ("You are so," one of us kids would usually respond. "You're in a bad mood.") So I'm going to take a week or two off, from the column and the podcast, hang out with the boyfriend and the kid, and burst into tears in coffee shops and grocery stores. I'll run some greatest hits in this space while I'm away—I'll find a column or two featuring Mom—and then I'll be back, just as filthy minded as ever. In lieu of flowers, please send pictures of your boyfriends' rear ends. (Lesbians may send flowers.) If you're the donation-making type and you're so inclined, my mother would be pleased to see some of your money flow to PFLAG ( or the Pulmonary Fibrosis Foundation (

Oh, one last thing: I was supposed to take my mother to see the national tour of The Drowsy Chaperone in Chicago this Friday, April 11. It was her birthday present. I got us great seats: seventh row, on the aisle. But I won't be able to use our tickets now. Not because it would be too depressing to go without my mother—not just because—but because, as rotten, stinking fate would have it, I'm going to be at my mother's wake on Friday night.

But I'm practical, like Mom, and I'd hate to see perfectly good tickets to a national tour of a hit Broadway musical go to waste. And it occurs to me that there has to be a teenage boy out there—in Chicago or close enough—who likes musicals and has a mother who loves him for the little musical-theater queen that he is. If you know that boy or you are that boy or you were that boy a decade ago or if you're that boy's mother or grandmother, send me an e-mail and I'll arrange to get these tickets to you.

Like I said, they're great seats. I would go if I could. But I can't.


aide: (Peace out)
Last day of work for the termmmm!  I feel like poo.  I slept later than I should have.  I was ready to crash around 9 but I stayed up until nearly 12 like a fool.  It's rainy and nasty and probably cold outside.  What a way to start spring break.  And I will be super pissed if they make me stay past 12:30pm even though no one has said I could go home early, I'm just going on what has happened the other 2 times there was no class and nothing going on.  I haven't even eaten breakfast or had coffee yet.  Wadjgjdsfksfgkjgtrrrrggggg.  I had a more enlightened post when I started to write this but it's disappeared.  I should dry my hair if it's going to be cold and narsty outside so I don't fall sick again.  I should probably go to the doctor at some point and get something for my eczema that's flaring up.  The worst I've had in years.  It's quite unpleasant because I can't help scratching my sleep.  And scratching feels so good.  Until I stop. 

I repeat: Wadjgjdsfksfgkjgtrrrrggggg. 
aide: (Default)
I got a call from mom at 1:30am last night becuase she's being stalked by creditors to pay the annual fees on credit cards that I didn't sign up for.  I had forgotten to get around to calling them, it just is so fucking inconvenient trying to call with a twelve hour time difference.  I finally called after forking out 2000 yen for a phone card and got mom's name added to the account so she can cancel it from Canada.  I hope that she's smart enough to do it for both accounts, since I forgot to mention there were two.  Fingers crossed.

Went to Jusco today and got a real table and chair because my knees and hips can't take sitting on the floor for much longer.  It's like I've got a constant ache in my left knee, even when its straight out on the floor, and its hard to bend when I have to get up.  On the walk home from Jusco, which is SO much closer than I thought, my hip was troubling me.  I'm only nearly 23!  What the fuck?  I don't even have a cool accident backstory to explain my various ails.  Boring.  The chair I got isn't spectacular, but it'll serve for now until I find a better one.  I might be able to score a rolly computer chair from Hard Off one day. 

April 2010

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