A costume designer somewhere needs to be lynched.

[aide]

I am going to subject you all to a lot of screen caps and my catty comments about the Time con constumes. I only hope to god they don't kill another herd of peacocks for the costumes this year. Alas, I haven't perfected the art of screencapping, so the quality kind of blows. But they are resized so they don't kill your screen. You'll get the picture.

Edit:  I know the costumes are made to be over the top so people can have a chance to see them from the back row (though when you're that far away, you can't see shit).  It's still fun to make fun of the heinousness.  And for the record: I LOVE SEQUINNS.

First costume: Militant Peacocks



So we're revisiting the "We Can Make It" military look. Except the costume wench decided it would be a good idea to not only make the costumes out of completely shiny material, but that it would be smart to stick on oversized broaches of feathers. Is that so they can be seen from the nosebleed row? Leader is the only one who doesn't look like a fool in it: Aiba's puppy-dog hair blends in with the orange feathers. Nino pretty much hates all costumes, I am certain. The feathers are a bit too fagoo, even for Jun. Sho has pink feathers. Enough said. They resemble Brazialian samba dancers, minus the giant boobs and skimpy bikinis.




Oh poor baby. Despite being stuck with the gayest colour, you can pull it off.


Until you go limp-wristed. Even if it is in the choreography, make it manly!!

Costume two: Rhinestone Cowboys



The pink satiny shirts are a bit much, especially when you put gold fringe on the shoulders. The only thing this costume has going for it is the pants make their asses look fabulous. Actually, Leaders ass (because he is the only one with one) actually looks kind of fat.

Aiba's Solo Costume: The Kindergardener



Aiba gets a free pass on this one: Even though he's got rainbow suspenders and fruity patches on the pants, they are baggy and give some bulk to his frame. The t-shirt is cute although the scarf is a bit much. It's a summer concert, for pete's sake.  It's a super kawaii costume, just like Aiba-chan. :D

Sho's Solo Costume: The Pimp



It's totally Saturday Night Fever, minus the bell-bottom pants. They love throwing really flamey scarves on these boys, that's for sure. I'm not sure what the fuck-me couch is all about, it was kind of a dumb prop. Unless he decides to stretch out on it half naked, there's no need for that.   Even if it was totally a song for makin' babies.

Costume Three: Bumblebees



They did a black/yellow costume to go with the album cover, I guess. It was, by far, one of the most pleasant. No excessive sequins, sparkles, or feathers. It's Leader's turn to wear the Pimp Scarf, while Jun and Sho get boas.

Nino's Solo Costume: The Pianist



Pretty normal, as far as costuming goes. The see-through piano was cute and the glasses were foxy.  More glasses-wearing!Nino, I say!  No need for flashy costumes when this song is way more about the music than performance.

Costume Four:  *________________*



I can't even come up with a name that would make enough fun of this abomination. When I first saw it, I physically recoiled and gasped. What. The. Hell??



It looks like a freaking dress! Even KAT-TUN have better costumes that this, and theirs are pretty fucking bad. Sho looks especially ridiculous in this get up with his CAT boots and muscles. "Gay" isn't a strong enough word. "Super gay"? "Mecha mecha Gay"?  I want to roll up into a ball and die.



Leader manages to pull it off (like most of thier heinous costumes), but only barely. Maybe it's because he's not put on display on pedestals in the middle of Tokyo Dome like Aiba and Sho.  I seriously don't know what they were thinking.  It's like a prom dress gone horribly, horribly wrong.  Maybe they stole Koda Kumi's pink dress from her Black Cherry Tour and split it between the 5 of them.



Costume Five: The Pink Army



Thank god this is what they stripped off to. T-shirts and camo cargos with a sparkly Arashi Summer logo on the front. Sho rocks a hat with "Show" on it; if the stylists did it, at least they have a sense of humor. I'm not sure what the purpose of all the tassles hanging off the pants was though. Although we should have learned by now that designers do things that have no purpose whatsoever.



Aw, Nino is just too cute. He looks like he's in pyjamas.

Costume Six: Star Spangled Banner



Pretty non-descript, considering what we've seen already. We have a rather Rah Rah USA theme here: stars, stripes, red, white and blue. And a good dose of shiny.

Jun's Solo Costume: MJ Wannabe



An '80s throwback, to be sure. Except it wasn't hot like Amuro Namie. There's a big monogramed MJ on the chest with "Yabai" on the back, in that gross shiny plasticy fabric. Again, it's a summer con, what's with the toque? Lime green, purple and blue? Gross. At least the moonwalk wasn't half bad.

Ohno's Solo Costume: DAMN FINE



Signature shirt/blazer combo. The colour was a bit dark and boring, though. It would have been nicer if the blazer was white, but he did that at a different con, if I remember. For Rain I think. Anyway, lookin' good Leader!



Aw, yeah. Damn fine.

Costume Seven: Satanic Wizard of Oz/60s Leisure Suits



Capes and interpretive dance?  I have no idea how this ties into anything.  Thank god these were only on for about a minute.



Under the capes we have some leisure suits. Nothing really scary, except for Jun who looks like he is about to do some drugs. I'm down with the hot Japanese head-towel thing, but that rag has to go. And you are not Corey Hart, take the sunglasses off.



Everyone else looks good though. It's actually a rather boring costume. Where's the shiny?

Costume Eight: Sequined Rainbow Goodness



Oh, there it is! More shiny, sequined fabric in their designated colours. Slight variations of course. Aiba gets the trench coat, Leader gets the track suit, Sho gets the vest to showcase those nice arms. Nino and Jun get kind of motorcycle jackets. The head rag is still there, though.



Those pants make leaders butt look good. Worthy of such fan service! Sho cops a feel.



They also make his cock look really good. I am convinced that Ohno is one of those men who can dispell the myth about Japanese guys having small dicks.

Costume Nine: Prom Dates



More feather corsages except they aren't eating their faces. The white suit is quite classy with the red accents, I do have to say. They all look quite refined and put together. I approve.



Sing it, Sho-chan.



Leader, will you go to the dance with me?

Costume Ten: Time Tees



The encore costume is nice and low-key.  Good for running around and riling up the crowd.  I don't know what's going on with Nino's green pants, though.  They do nothing for you.  And Sho sports the head towel but it should have been white.



Talk to the hand.  The t-shirts have sparkly Time logos on them.  Super cute.  And not a heinous yellow, like the suit the put Jun in for his Pepsi Nex campaign.  Barf.  I am wondering if they sell t-shirts at the concerts, because I would totally buy one, wear it to work and show all the middle school kids what I did over the weekend.



Need some heavy lifting?  Meathead!Sho, at your service.  Look at those guns.

And I'm spent.  It's 12:30am, and I should be getting up at 6:30am to get ready for work.  Although this totally just pumped me up, I don't know if I'll be falling asleep before 2am.  I am too witty for my own good.

Comments

[karadin.livejournal.com]

I think they have a say in their costumes, because in one interview the boys mention attaching things themselves (scary) and you have to remember the costumes are designed to be seen from a distance, not just for the cameras and the front rows,

For example, Jun's hat was there to keep the hair out of his face, but also so that you could see he had a head when he was up there on the ceiling. And the trashy costumes are one of the reasons I like Johnny's so much, Arashi can carry it off!

[blood-opal.livejournal.com]

I wonder if they had a say in the gigantic feathers for Everybody ZENSHIN though? 'Cause they were all like, "It pokes you in the face," during the MC. XD

[blood-opal.livejournal.com]

Costume 1: I don't mind the sparkly, really. But the feathers... well, if anything, I'll like it because we got to see Sho act like a dork and wave his shoulder to flap the feathers at the audience in the MC. XD

Costume 2: It shows just how much Johnny's has brainwashed me that I thought this costume actually looked pretty okay. It's a GIANT improvement over their neon-pink suits that they wore to the Asia Song Festival at least.

Aiba solo: Though his costume did irk me a bit, I was more disturbed by the costumes of his backdancers. Really, JUST LOOK AT THEM! >.<

Costume 3: I LOVE THE BUMBLEBEE OUTFIT! XDDD

Costume 4: It reminds me of the costume they wore singing Blue in How's It Going con, except someone threw up a lot of pastel colours on it. You'd think Johnny would let them outgrow those kinds of costumes, or at least ditch the ruffles.

MatsuJun solo: I LOVE THIS COSTUME. It's like Jun's version of Where's Waldo, except he totally wants to be found. XDDD

Costume 7: I didn't get the giant cloaks either, but I believe the dance was supposed to be intermission for Ohno to change and get back since he just did his solo. I actually kinda like Jun's head-towel-bandanna thing though that's probably because I just like seeing him wear them. The actual length doesn't really bother me.

Costume 8: My favourites! Colour-coded and oh-so-shiny but still looking fairly normal! XDDD I'll seriously be sad if they don't keep this outfit.

Costume 10: Sho usually ends up wearing the tank tops, doesn't he? And the neck of Nino's was pretty big, I kept expecting it to fall off his shoulder or something. Their names are on the back too. I would totally buy these shirts. XD

[maiaide.livejournal.com]

I'm always down for sequins and shiny. I've worked in theatre, I know what gets seen and what does. It's just so.... gay. XD But that's why we love it. But the feathers...

[seewhoiam.livejournal.com]

Lolz, I saw the concert yesterday and I have to say, costume number 4 was definitely the worst of all. I almost fell off my chair when I saw them wearing THAT thing. The rest of them are not that bad, I like shiny things xD I wouldn´t have put those feathers on the first costumes though xDDD

[monomezurashii.livejournal.com]

They sell concert T-shirts as one of the concert goods. For the time con, it's kinda like the yellow one they wear (except there are some part of theirs which were "adjusted").

Their costumes were designed so that everybody in the stadium could see and identify them. Thus, sparkles, hideous feathers, ruffles, etc, and colors. Though sometimes the coloring is off, but mostly you'd know...it's Aiba when it's green, or Sho when it's Red, etc.

The one set that I could not get used to until now (after several replays on the DVD), is just that green ruffly thing (>.<).

Arashi would make me go "kyaaa~~~" no matter what they wear (or not wear) anyway.

[maiaide.livejournal.com]

For sure. I'm all over the shiny and feathers. Although when you're in the nosebleed row of Tokyo Dome, no amount of sequins and oversized feathers is going to help you see anything. XD That's what the super big monitors are for! But love nonetheless.

YA! I'm so buying a t-shirt when I go in May. >D

[moeruze-burning.livejournal.com]

d;sohfadfg.

I liked a lot of their outfits because this is like, the only time I get to see someone sing and dance in Absolutely Fucking Retarded Outfits. :DDD FUN STUFF.

Oh, and those dangly things off the back of their pants? OBVIOUSLY FOR BONDAGE. Of course they edited the bondage scenes out but I totally bet there was some. :D

Ahaha, WHAT I WOULDN'T GIVE TO SEE THEM ALL WEARING THIS. :DDD!! (http://www.carlamusic.com/gallery/albums/Not-Real-Love-video-pics/C44.jpg)

Mmm. Go dream of sparkly crotches and Riida molestation. <3 SWEET DREAMS BABE.

PS: I really liked the shiny silver capes and Nino and Aiba shooting ray guns a;s;'akdsyrsetrakrask;.

[maiaide.livejournal.com]

OMG FIC IDEAAAA.
I am seriously hoping whatever sadistic deity has been smiling down on me lately gives me fucking great seats so I can see the sparkly-feathery-ruffle GAY up close.

[trishatorga.livejournal.com]

the feathers are funny., there could've been a better way to put together these costumes., (i just don't know how at the moment...too shocked to think) XDDD

but costume 4....ano... [o.o]"

[karmade.livejournal.com]

I fell from chair laughing histerically. In truth, non of those costumes bothered me (do not count four. and maybe first), and I freaking loved Juns solo costume (yes, I am this bad xD) but your describtions cracked me up. So, so true xDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

[112188.livejournal.com]

Lol, their green costume with the trash on the side reminds me of NEWS's costume-made-of-trash as well! Except theirs was white and didn't have neatly placed trash on the side, it was really just trash superglued around the costume.

I really liked the yellow costumes...I think Johnny's does well with yellow. It reminded me of their countdown 07-08 costumes...actually now that I think of it, since this concert was before then the costumes were probably the same? I don't know. I loved it though :D

I thought the feathers were quite humorous XD At least they're not wearing clear, see-through costumes like their very first appearance on music station..........................

[maiaide.livejournal.com]

Trash is a perfect way to describe it. It reminds me a bit of the little mermaid too.

[paperdoll.livejournal.com]

When I saw costume 4, the first thing I thought of was a Halloween costume I've seen in the past where one half of the body is a bride and the other half is a groom.

Except, you know, someone puked on it.

[maiaide.livejournal.com]

Maybe they got super trashed after the final show and then puked on it. You know, gotta be professional.

[darchan.livejournal.com]

except for Jun who looks like he is about to do some drugs *dies*

XDDDDDD

oh you're G~GOOOOOOOOD
and you're an OHNOfan...
yey for that...

[maiaide.livejournal.com]

Thank you kindly. XD

I am an Ohnofan now... Until I saw him do art I just always though of him as the old(est), short one. But then I was drawn to the hotness. >DDD

Arashi is the PRETTY SHINNY the world desperately needs!

[honeycorrupts.livejournal.com]

You beat me to the punch. As a fashion design student, the outfits that the Johnnys are made to wear, makes me weep and want to hurt the designer.

I really don't get the feathers. I know they are supposed to be flashy, which they already have because Arashi isn't Arashi without some glittery pants and a matching top, but the feathers are not needed. I would have taken the song Be With Me, a bit more serious if it only wasn't for those feathers. Although Aiba crying in the middle of the song made up for it.

I think my favorite costume had to be Aiba. But it might be because I'm biased, and adore Aiba to bits. The garment was cute, adorable, and made me squee like a total fangirl.

It's my personal belief that Sho only wear sleeveless tops. Those arms cannot be covered! It's cruel and unusual punishment to prevent the fans from looking at those arms.

Jun's costume for his solo, was horrible. Colors clashing, and made Jun just a bit, may I say it....ugly not so cool looking.

Costume 4 wins the worst design ever thought up of.

The last outfits I liked. It reminded me of the 24hour TV. &hearts

I think I cried inside when I learned that these guys had a say in their costumes. I know KAT-TUN themselves added fur and stuff to their clothes, for the pirate inspired concert, and made each thing look even odd.

I loved your comments, great thing to wake up to after only sleeping for about 5 hours. I'm mem'ing this!

Re: Arashi is the PRETTY SHINNY the world desperately needs!

[maiaide.livejournal.com]

YAY~ I loved being mem'd. XD I would mem myself but that's a bit silly. No jk.

Pirates and fur? Were they like... Inuit pirates? Viking pirates?

Aiba's WAS cute. The solo costumes were the tamest by far, but Jun's colour combos were just fug. There was no excuse for that. I am always a fan of "regular" looking costumes like jeans and tees, though a well-chosen suit will more-than catch my attention. I think my favourite flashy costume was the black shiny thing from last concert with the union jacks on the back and gloves. Everyone looked foxxxy.

Anyway, I'm glad you enjoyed it. It was too much fun to write. ♥♥♥

[banana-babe-qt.livejournal.com]

haha I loved your review... I do often times wonder WTF are the designers thinking?... Maybe they are jealous of Arashi and want to try to secretly destroy them? I mean that pastel mess... really...I mean... come on!! But this caption of yours was my favorite:
Costume Seven: Satanic Wizard of Oz/60s Leisure Suits

hahaha I love it! Thanks for sharing your humor/seriousness/review ^_^

[maiaide.livejournal.com]

Aw thanks! I'm glad other people can appreciate my humour/wittiness. ♥

IT TOTALLY WAS SATANIC. And then a bit like Star Wars. And then kind of like bad 60's porn. Minus the nekkid and secks.

[theahhmoment.livejournal.com]

Thanks for doing this. Totally made me laugh so much. I havent finish watching the whole thing yet (actually I only watched like the first 2 mins of it). But I gotta say, I REALLY hate those darn feathers with a passion. I hope those designers do a better job next time.

[goopawahla.livejournal.com]

I'm going to be brave and just admit I liked costume 1. I would have liked it a lot more without the feathers, but even with the feathers I like it. >_< I think I might have bad taste? XD Nothing wrong with the Vegas showgirl look...
I thought the dance steps were even more hilarious. The shoulder shaking and hail hilter-ing circle march... I couldn't stop laughing.

Costume 4... is the fugliest Arashi costume to date. There are no adjectives to describe that level of ugly.

All in all, I thought the costumes were pretty ok this time around.
You should totally buy and Arashi con shirt and wear it all over the place to spread the love and to make all the people who didn't get to go jealous. ;D

[maiaide.livejournal.com]

Oh good, I wasn't the only one to notice the zeig-heil. I thought I was seeing things. To be honest, but the end the feathers grew on me. They were still like, eating their faces, but were kind of fun to watch them fight with. XD I'm so sadistic.

I agree - there are no words to describe the fugly.

I am on a t-shirt MISSION. That, and a million other useless goods that I don't actually have money for.

[greentea-junkie.livejournal.com]

matsujun's costume is pretty bad.

heck, all of them are pretty bad. nino's solo wasn't that horrible though :D

man. these japanese costume designers.
sigh. where do they get these ideas that the costumes will look good?

[mojojowan.livejournal.com]

hahahaha!

i think i'm already "immune" to their costumes XD

well, the first time i saw them with their flashy and whatsoever costumes, i was totally shocked! i didn't expect that they're going to wear something like that.... but i'm getting used to it after seeing them many times wearing those kind of costumes... i will just pay attention to their faces/dance/performance XD

thanks for sharing your opinion :)

[neikanshinigami.livejournal.com]

I literally. Fell OFF my chair. ROFLMAO

This was fabulous, thank you. I'm still holding out until my copy arrives, but I thought I'd spoil myself with this. Actually, considering the usual Arashi attire, they weren't that bad.

EXCEPT FOUR. OMG.
I wanted to barf. Really. Flashy or not, Four is just... ATROCIOUS.

Much love to the Bumblebees and Jun's solo outfit, though. *nods*

[ktmonkeyj.livejournal.com]

Bumblebees is my favorite~~~
I'm making Jun's costume, so i've been looking at the video for the longest time~~~
All of these costumes has so many nice & shiny details!

[panthera-mort.livejournal.com]

hahhaha
this is great!
i haven't gotten my dvd yet but i love teasers.
i've seen their first costume splattered basically everywhere and referencing it to Brazialian samba dancers = so true!
but really, if they wore the skinny bikinis and fake boob, it'd be much better

the rest's pretty normal for arashi, i think.
they have done much worst... like nino's poncho in step n go
bu the dress with half of it dyed in rainbow colors are horrible!
O_O

oof, thank God arashi are pretty enough to look good even in the most ridiculous costumes + all that sweat.
thanks for the screen caps!

[maiaide.livejournal.com]

Touche, the poncho was pretty bad. Maybe they should have superglued some feathers and sequinns on it.

[evolardnek.livejournal.com]

LMAO~ i have no words for this entry but....

its all true, i wonder some times who comes up with their costume designs!
i mean come on arashi you have the looks but the outfits need to be burned :3

Thanks for this! it made me laugh!

[tenshi-angels87.livejournal.com]

*memories*

[jennah-13.livejournal.com]

LOL, this is hilarious!! XDDDD

INORITE!? Costume four was just too hideous!!
Seriously, I DID NOT GET IT!! There are no words to describe them enough, really. XD

and LOL, yess. The gigantic feathers for Everybody ZENSHIN was...UGH. It's like a chicken threw up on them or sth. XD

ROFL, but then again, what is Johnny's without the sequins, ruffles, feathers, unnecessary cloth hangings and shiny ghei costumes, right? LOLz.
I love them still. XD hahaha. It's just fun to laugh at the costumes.

[jocularreaction.livejournal.com]

LOLx2984012 I loved your review 'cause it was exactly what I was thinking!!! Costume#4 seriously made me pause the video and gag. I actually feel embarrassed for them. The "YAY USA FTW!" and Rhinestone Cowboys are my 2nd and 3rd least favorite. I think Sho-chan mentioned during the MC something how those hugeass peacock feathers were throwing him off 'cause it was blocking his vision. I may be wrong though.

[yuri-senritsu.livejournal.com]

HAHA This was hilarious. Thanks so much for the commentary.
I dunno though, some of Arashi's costumes make everyone so sexy, but then other times they look so incredibly horrible I want to die. Can we half-lynch the costume designers? XD

[frazzled-niya.livejournal.com]

*is currently under the desk scared*